Hey folks! I was thinking that it's almost Halloween and what better time is there to throw my latest Brain Damage film in to the trusty VHS tape playing machine and see what horrors await me. So, I sat down with my Newport 100's and my cup of coffee (my first mistake today is that I didn't lace the coffee with scotch!) and turned on Dr. Shock's Tales of Terror. A collection of four short stories introduced by Doctor Shock himself. This guy looks like he's been through a little to much electro shock therapy (hence the name?) and is now in need of a hair piece and facial hair appliances, but don't let that scare you off! He's very excited about his stories and promises they will be blood soaked tales of lunacy. I will, as always, remain skeptical!

Our first tale is called Bullet For a Vampire. This one has a little bit of everything. Packed full of stereotypical mobsters, a Gypsy, and (of course) Vampires! I would never recommend this combination because what you end up with is a long drawn out look at what happens when a mob boss crosses an old Gypsy woman, who just happens to have a Vampire at her disposal. I can guarantee you that this one is going to get ugly!

Next up is a little beauty called The Town That Loved Pizza. Two inbred brothers drive into a small town and open up a pizza parlor. Let me tell you folks, the health inspector has never been through this place, that's for sure. I don't even want to drive through a town where people don't have the sense to ask what kind of meat is on their pizza. I think we should keep the "don't ask don't tell policy" within the confines of the military! The populations going down quick as the demand for the brother's all meat pizzas go up. Hey people got to eat, right!

Next we stumble down a lonely garden path and into a tale called The Garden Tool Murders. Here we find a humble gardener who's pretty fed up with his bosses constant nagging and insults. Now, through in a litter bug or two and he finally snaps and begins to use his garden implements as God intended. Who knew a weed wacker could make such a mess? (I had always hoped they could but I'm a dreamer) and just in time for the Cherry Festival, too! Who will save us from this lawn mowing lunatic? The answer is almost as scary as the movie itself!

Our last story (There is a God!) is a lesson in common sense! Demons Day is the films tribute to cloning efforts everywhere. Let me start off by saying that if your lab assistant brings you a girl who's had her heart ripped out of her chest and you think it's a good idea to clone the non human cells under her fingernails, when you don't have any idea what killed her, you've pretty much asked for it. Why on earth would you want two of them running around? There's a strong possibility it could be the prince of darkness. But if you must, you must! Don't say I didn't warn you!

I wasn't overly thrilled by this one. For the most part the stories were extremely long and drawn out. My mind kept wandering to things like doing the laundry! If it's a short story and the person watching it wants to do house work, you've stretched the story a little too far. Bullet For a Vampire was around forty minutes long but it could have been an excellent short if they had cut out the time they wasted showing us that we were dealing mobsters who shouldn't be trifled with. It was like the writer of the Soprano's fell down, cracked his head open, and nothing but typical over used mob stereotypes spilled out of his head and onto the film. If they had cut the short down to twenty minutes they could have kept the guts of the story and it would have been entertaining.

There where some things I liked about the movie however. They actually took some time to use decent latex appliances for make up FX and some really decent lighting for some of the shots. You can tell that they actually put the time in to keep all the scenarios from looking the same. They even managed to add a bit of atmosphere to some of the set pieces. There's a fairly decent amount of blood in here as well. Unfortunately, the time and effort spent on the make up and the look of each scene was not enough to make this a movie that I'd run out and buy (perhaps a rental?).

Generally, I applaud any effort people show in making their movies. If it's creative and has a little bit of heart, I'll give it a fair shot. I really can't say I feel that way about this movie though. In my opinion, they took the easy way out and filled it with plastic characters. I think you really sell your own creativity short when you're entire film is full of extreme stereotypes. In this instance, they used in breeders, geeks, bitchy mob princesses, and mad scientists in an attempt to get their story noticed. When really, all you end up with is a movie that mimics a million others out there. Once you do that, all your hard work in making the film look good is wasted and you end up with something that fades to the background of the horror world.