Make no mistake about it, The Monsters love bad movies. Sure, we like good movies as well (maybe even more...maybe) but there's definitely something to be said for a 'so bad it's good' cinematic monstrosity. We try as hard as we can when making distinctions around here, simply because we never want to (intentionally) lead our dedicated readers down the wrong path. It's all subjective anyway, but I'd be willing to wager that if you're reading this at all, then you and I are most likely on the same page (or at least pretty damn close). This brings us to Lady Terminator, the latest double scoop treat from those crazy fellas over at Mondo Macabro. Now with a new distribution deal (through Ryko) Mondo Macabro should have a steady slate of releases in the US on the horizon, with Lady T hitting store shelves the end of September. So bad it's good? You betcha, wait'll you hear all about this one!

So, our story opens as we learn of the mythical South Sea Queen, a bloodthirsty demon of sorts (having taken the form of a seductress), who thrives off of tearing apart men's privates. Yeah, you read that right. So one day she meets her match, and this guy yanks a snake (which turns into a small dagger) from her special private bathing suit area. Obviously angry, she vows revenge in 100 years on his great granddaughter (sure, why not?). Moving forward to present time (the 80's) we're introduced to a college student (played by the adorable Barbara Anne Constable) who immediately proclaims "I'm not a lady, I'm an anthropologist!" - Trust me, it's a lot funnier when she says it. So aside from the fact that Constable looks great in a bikini, she heads out to sea in search of the dagger that once belonged to the South Sea Queen (cause "That's where the book tells her she has to go"). The boat is swept away by a tidal wave (in a hilariously executed sequence) and she is magically transported to a 'mattress in the middle of nowhere' - where she is bound and assaulted my a snake like creature that crawls into her most intimate of areas. See where we are going with this?

She emerges naked from the ocean that evening, (she looks even better nude than she did in that bikini) with the evil of the South Sea Queen inside of her (or something like that). She then wreaks havoc throughout town all the while attempting to locate and dispose of an up and coming pop star (great granddaughter?). Clad in a tube top, leather jacket and brandishing some sort of semi-automatic weapon, Lady T destroys just about anything (or anyone) that gets in her way. All the while a few inept cops (Snake has the best mullet ever) try to put a stop to her wily ways. Things get pretty crazy here, and by the final act (when Lady T keeps coming back for more...and more...and more) they blow up just about everything they can, including planes, helicopters, cars - you name it. What a way to go Lady T!

I first caught a glimpse of Lady T in a Mondo Macabro featurette included on their UK Mystics in Bali disc (the same documentary is featured on this disc as well) and I was completely enthralled. When I heard that Lady T was getting the Mondo Macabro treatment on DVD, I was immediately onboard and I am happy to say that I was not disappointed. Since acquiring Lady T, I've watched it about 4 times. Needless to say, its replay value is tremendous. Just go in knowing that you're not sitting down with a classic of modern cinema, this is midnight movie fare all the way, and top notch at that.

What makes Lady T so special? Well, Constable in a bikini, for starters, Constable naked...did I mention Constable in a bikini? Seriously though, this girl looks good in a bikini. Moving along, the dialogue is hilarious, dubbing atrocious, optical effects (and there are plenty of 'em) are super cool and cheesy, and even hotel rooms have layers of fog running through them! The elements that are unapologetically borrowed from The Terminator are pretty riotous as well, including self surgery on the ole' eyeball. I wish I could say that it's good clean fun, but there ain't nothing clean about this. Lady T plows through innocent citizens left and right, always finding time to strip down (thank you god), bed a male and tear his privates to shreds, good times. There's a lot of silly going on here, just the way I like it, tons of fun.

Audio and video quality do quite well. The print used exhibits its age and budgetary limitations. There's some dirt etc. but overall looks pretty good considering the title at hand. The mono audio is clear with no distortion. Extras include a trailer, alternate clothed scenes, text essays on Indonesian Horror and Exploitation, The Legend of the South Seas Queen, a Director Tjut Djalil filmography and a still gallery. Also included are previews for other Mondo Macabro titles (past and future) and a very worthwhile 25-minute documentary on Indonesian fantasy/horror films (the same piece featured on MM's PAL release of Mystics in Bali). We can only hope that many more of the films previewed in this piece wind up on DVD at some point as well.

All's well that ends well and once again I have to commend Mondo Macabro on a job well done. There are few companies out there that I would continue to support on every release sight unseen and Mondo Macabro is one of them. The continue to release some fantastically fun cult gems on DVD with lots o' love and care, Lady T is no exception. Highly recommended.