It's about time for another one of my patented Monsters at Play Spoiler Warnings (or MAPSW™), so I hope you're all fully prepared. It'll prove quite difficult to discuss the film Haute Tension at any substantial length without giving away info that could be viewed by some as the oh so dreaded spoiler. Of course, I'm going to do my best to not really give anything away here, but one never truly knows...does one? Here's the deal, if you have any interest in checking out Haute Tension, take one horror nuts' word for it and just go see it, in all of it's uncut glory. End of discussion. If you feel the need to read on and experience the wraith of the Head Vampire's gratuitous opinions, then by all means, continue forth and suffer.

Brutal and uncompromising, familiar and cliché, these are all words that can be used to describe Alexandre Aja's frightfully appealing Haute Tension (High Tension). There's probably just as much to like in this film, as there is to hate. However, for me, the end experience still wound up of the wholly satisfying kind. The more I think about it, the more I like it. Love it or hate it, agree with it or disagree with it, Aja has crafted and an effectively frightening, over the top gore-fest that manages to keep its balances in check. Even with a mix of elements that will cause you to grin in both equal amounts of glee and disgust, we've got the makings here for a true horror classic. People will be talking about this one for quite some time; there's no doubt about it - see you at the water cooler.

Two female companions (if you know what I mean and I think you do), Marie (Cecile de France) and Alex (Maiwenn) hit the open road to visit with Alex's family at their secluded home in the French countryside. Upon arrival, Alex takes a quick shower, while Marie furiously masturbates to her most favorite of reggae songs (it happens to be my new favorite as well). It isn't too long after bedtime that a most unwelcome visitor makes an appearance (in a truck that just screams Jeepers Creepers). Alex is bound and gagged and Marie is forced to play hide and seek as one by one, the occupants of the house are brutally slaughtered by an overall-wearing maniac. When Alex is thrown in the back of his truck, Marie goes along for the ride, in what quickly becomes a frightening test of wits and survival. That is of course until things go a bit sour with a 'twist' that will unfortunately either make it for some of us and really break it for the rest of us, 'nuff said on that for the time being.

OK, story elements aside, let's talk about the good stuff here. There is very little to complain about in Haute Tension, and that is the true bottom line. The title (if you can even pronounce it) doesn't lie, as there are quite a few fantastic genre set pieces to behold. Aja's film is frightening and suspenseful, with elements that seem to be missing from just about every other horror film that's been produced in recent years. He manages to tie these filmmaking elements together, in a genre that's usually not respected for its cinematic qualities. Haute Tension has a great gritty 70's look, a tremendous score (which mixes pop music and classic film scoring elements) and fantastic performances all around. While the characters aren't as developed as one would normally like to see, we still do indeed care about these people - because they are in fact just that...real people.

Possible spoilers in this paragraph! Then there's the end. The end that forces you to rethink what you've just seen. The end which can be interpreted in quite a few ways. The end that will force many who have sat through the first 75-minutes to walk away unsatisfied. I could have lived without the twist, however, what precedes the twist is so damn strong that I just cannot hold a grudge. In retrospect, the twist works in its own way, and its ambiguity oddly enough, almost becomes the films' strongest ally...but you'll have to be the judge and jury on that one yourself.

Admittedly there's not a whole lot of new in Haute Tension, but the real beauty here lies in the fact that Aja takes these familiar conventions, and winds up using and abusing them to their fullest potential. Too often horror filmmakers become lazy, and figure that just because they've employed these familiar scare tactics, they will automatically suffice, which is most certainly not the case. Haute Tension does the dance well, with an even balance where even the most subtle of stalking scenes keeps the viewer on the edge of their seat, their heart pounding and racing. I can't even tell you the last time I felt that way in a theater, it's a great feeling and one that's not to be taken lightly.

Special effects are provided by Gianetto De Rossi who's worked on such classic European horror films like The Beyond, House by the Cemetery and Zombie. Needless to say, the effects work here is extremely gruesome and over the top. The only way and I do mean the only way to see this film is in its completely uncut form. For starters, look forward to a tremendous slit throat, beheading, random blood sprays and a nasty shard of glass stuck in a mangled foot.

Luckily, word on the street is that Lions Gate plans on keeping the well-deserved NC-17 rating that Haute Tension has earned from those devils known as the MPAA. With a limited theatrical release planned and a DVD not too far along after that, one can only hope that this film gets the treatment that it truly deserves upon its home video release. C'mon Lions Gate, do us proud. For better or for worse, Aja earned the directors chair on a Hills Have Eyes remake because of this film. How bout we make another balls-to-the-wall backwoods horror flick, and call it anything BUT The Hills Have Eyes? Just a suggestion.

In the end, Haute Tension wound up a truly satisfying cinematic experience for me and a welcomed breath of fresh air. Too often we as horror fans, get caught up in making compromises, enjoying films because they are not that bad or because they wind up as and example of the best of the worst. In the case of Haute Tension, it truly does deserve your attention, simply because it's one hell of an effective horror flick. Flaws aside, Haute Tension is without a doubt, one of the best all around genre efforts that I've seen in recent years, and that's really saying something. I can't recommend it enough and if you don't check it out, it's truly your loss.

Thumbs Up for suspense, over-the-top gore fx and for showing me the joys of masturbating to reggae.