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by Michael Johnson Games Editor
The fifth day of the 12th Philadelphia Film Festival left us bitter, angry, and thirsting for human blood. Our honor had been besmirched, our livelihood unscrupulously assaulted by a brutish band of whistling, warbling, wailing degenerates. Our resolve is absolute, and our vengeance will be swift and terrible.
To those who desecrated our Graveyard of Honor: we are coming for you.
 After the deplorable behavior of the Graveyard of Honor audience, Lawrence angrily vows revenge. The fist has been shaken; blood will be spilled. |
 Aiding Lawrence in his quest for vengeance, Michael signals his readiness by flashing his dual ivory revolvers of justice. Oh wait, those are just his middle fingers. |
 After watching Come Drink With Me, Lawrence is completely smitten with its captivating female lead, Cheng Pei Pei. |
 "No! No! Don't kill Cheng Pei Pei!" exclaims a visibly shaken Lawrence. He later cries himself to sleep. |
 Eternal Blood leaves Michael hungry for human flesh. Or a cheesesteak, whichever is cheaper. Either way it's finger-lingling good. |
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